i think it would be neat if netflix doubled as a dating site like “here are 9 other singles in your area that watched supernatural for 12 straight hours”
uhm there’s only 4 of us in our house but we have 8 toothbrushes and we’re all adamant that we each only own one
Uh oh…have you checked your arms for tally marks?!
are you suggesting that there are 4 silence living in my house and brushing their teeth on a regular basis
hygiene is important to everyone
they have no mouths
don’t be racist
An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard and a German are all standing watching a street performer do some excellent juggling. The juggler notices that the four gentlemen have a very poor view, so he stands up on a large wooden box and calls out, “Can you all see me now?”
Took me about ten minutes to finally understand this
stupidest/most awesome joke ever
It’s a metaphor, see: you hold a pen with your homework in front of you, but you don’t do it, you don’t give it the power to do its killing
Sometimes you stop talking to someone because you keep telling yourself that if they wanted to talk to you, they would.
i think it’s a universal truth that everyone in our generation takes pluto’s losing its planetary status as a personal offense
pluto is smaller than russia. why did we ever even consider it a planet?
BECAUSE IT’S A PART OF OUR SOLAR SYSTEM
OHANA MEANS FAMILY
FAMILY MEANS NO ONE IS LEFT BEHIND
dude i’m gonna frickin hold your hand so hard it’s gonna blow your mind with how hecka rad my affection is
every year after you turn 17 you get further away from being the age of the dancing queen and that’s my least favorite thing about growing up
ah but when you turn 34 you’re two dancing queens and thus having twice the time of your life. and at 51 you become the dancing triumvirate and three golden crowns are forged in your honor
lots to look forward to
Hello, Police? I accidentally stepped on my cats foot and need to be arrested